Last night, just like every other night since you have been born I went upstairs to check on you before I went to bed. I am not sure why I do this, I just have to. Of course, you were laying there with your pants pulled down to your ankles and your diaper unsecured and half way off. I know better than to let you sleep with no diaper on so I had to try to put a diaper on you and not wake you up. Not an easy task for the little girl who wakes up at even the sound of footsteps on carpet. Of course, you woke up. But you didnt cry. I told you I had to put your diaper on and you could go back to sleep. You just stayed there, watching me and when I was done, I put my hand on your chest and told you I loved you. You put your hand on top of mine and closed your eyes. Every time I tried to move it you opened your eyes and held it tighter. I was so tired from going all day on 3 hours of sleep and I couldnt stand there any more but I couldnt leave you there being so adorable. So I asked you if you wanted to rock. Of course you did, you always want to rock. We rocked for a while, I held you, smelled your hair, tickled your back and you cuddled me tight. I couldnt love those times any more if I tried. Then you told me you had to go poo poo. So, I let you down and you ran into the bathroom and sat up on the potty. You tooted really loud and well, that was it. You were pretty darn proud of yourself though and I couldnt do anything but laugh. I had to go lay down it was almost 9:30 by this time so I asked if you wanted to come to bed with mommy and daddy. The thought of leaving you in your crib was too much for me for some reason. We walked into our room and you squeeled with glee to see daddy in bed with Maui May. We climbed into bed and in your normal fashion you acted like it was play time. I finally turned the TV off and told you it was night night time and we all needed to go to sleep. You would be quiet for a few seconds and then realize you had so much more to tell us. When I would make the noise Shhhhhh, you would shhhhhh back and start whispering everything you had to say. Finally, I had to get stern and tell you that if you didnt go to sleep, it was back into the crib for you. A couple more whispering episodes and all was quiet. Even though I was completely exhausted and all I wanted to do was go to sleep I couldnt help but stay awake and think about how lucky we are, how amazing you are and what a gift you are to us, to this world. Tatum Emily, you are the most amazing little girl and last night was one of my most treasured nights. I love you so much. I never imagined my heart could be this big. I never imagined my little girl would be so amazing and I never imagined in such tough times my life could be so full. I just cant even wait to see what you do next. I love you.