Thursday, June 18, 2009

To work or not to work

This is something that I have struggled with since T was born. I have always said that I didnt think I could be a stay at home mom. Even if we won the lottery and money was no object I would still work some version of part time. I always wondered, does that make me a bad mom? I cant say that I am not envious of my friends who get to stay home....some days. Other days, I think that I might lose it if I wasnt going to work. I always wondered why it is that some people seem to think that they are somehow a better mom than I am because they stay home. Or why the people that work think they are better moms because they go to work. It never made any sense to me. We are all blessed with the title "mom". We all struggle with the same stuff with our kids and the decisions we make and whether or not these decisions will land them in therapy one day. Its a tough job. I dont think anyone who stays home has it any easier than those that go to work. Honestly, I think its harder to stay home. You dont get a break. With all that said, I wondered if I was the only one who, while I love going to work felt this constant guilt about doing so or just this little shred of envy for those who didnt have or choose to. I always wondered if because I choose to work, that makes me not as good of a mom. Then I read this post from this super funny, insanely honest mom and it all made sense. The grass is always going to be greener on the other side some days and other days, you grass is going to be the best. So, why dont we all just be happy with our situations and make the best of what we have. We are all good moms, struggling to be the best we can be for our kids and our husbands. Pretty simple really. You should check it out, although if you dont like swear words and painful honesty, it might not be the blog for you.

3 comments:

Mom/Grammie P said...

Where "DO" you find these things???? Interesting read about "feelings" and the struggle with "what is truly the right thing to do"! I do believe you have it hit on the head... the grass is always greener! I know very few women that have not at one time or another... struggled with the decisions they made or must make. The one thing I am sure of is... each want to be the best "mom" they can be! So we trudge on and do the very best we can at that particular moment in time. I suppose the important part is understanding that is all you can do... make the best decision for "your" family at "that" moment. Looking back will give you plenty of time to second guess yourself.
XOXOX
Goonie

Angie Giannotti said...

I love this blog!!! THanks for pointing it out to me.. I completely agree with you and this article about the grass always being greener!! I like you feel like I'm a better mom because I work...but that's me. I don't expect anyone else to feel the same way!!! Hope all is well. I love reading your blog and seeing pics of your sweet little girl. We really should try to get together one of these days!

Anonymous said...

I'm so glad you brought this subject up. What's right for one isn't right for another, no one should be judged for their personal decisions. You're an EXCELLENT mom, Jaclyn! Your daughter is as well adjusted as those who's moms don't work, probably better than some. You're doing what's right for you and your family - don't EVER feel guilty for that. Let tongues wag, it's not your problem.
XXOO,
Your mom, who worked and enjoyed it.

 
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